Christian Character Weekend

10367727_887657724601420_4521312355298975287_n   by: Lea Datugan

Character – who we are even no one see us

  • Because we are sons and daughters of God, we must reflect His image. If we are to draw others to Christ.

3 important things

  • Emotions guided by the Holy Spirit
  • Learn to control emotions
  • Not let emotions decide. Think before we speak or act..we have to think first…huwag magpadala…
  • Our will submitted to the father
  • Must allow Him to mold us
  1. Taking on the posture of humility (Talk 2: The Character of Humility) – pride
  2. Surrendering our fears to God (Talk 3: The Character of Courage) – fear of being alone, fear of everything – feeling of being unworthy
  3. Anger (Talk 4: Righteous and Unrighteous Anger) – handling anger
  4. Surrender and Inner Healing (Talk 5: The Character of Surrender) – surrendering lives; we can’t leave our future if we can’t forget and forgive the past – move on
  5. A heart Attuned to Christ (Talk 6: A Heart Attuned to Christ)

TALK I:  OUR EMOTIONS AND OUR CHARACTER

Emotions – character (impulsive/possessing self-control, uncharitable/loving, easily angered/period difficult to please/cheerful) – relationship with others

  • Conscious mental reaction (as anger not fear)…typically accompanied by physiological and behavioural changes in the body.
  • Spontaneously rather than through conscious effort.
  • Emotions/feelings are important but we should not let them be the sole basis of our decisions and actions. Otherwise, could lead to problems.
  • We should never make decisions when we are highly emotional about something

2 Wrong Attitudes Held About Emotions

  • Enemies and Master

ENEMIES – anger, anxiety, grief (negative)

  • Because we consider emotions us bad, we ignore/deny them (repression/suppression)
  • Engage in behaviour that expresses exact opposite feeling. Denying/avoiding our emotions prevents us from dealing with them/addressing to the situations.  Thus we are not able to reconcile with the person who made us angry.

MASTERS – dwell on our feelings

Sad – miserable

Angry – hurt

Selfishness – wrong doing

The Right Attitudes toward Emotions

Emotions are God given and are good

  • By agitating us motivate us to action
  • Jesus showed a whole range of emotions

The Last Supper – Luke 22:15 “He said to them, I have eagerly desired to eat this Passover with you before I suffer”

The Raising of Lazarus – John 11:35 “and Jesus wept”

The Cleansing of a Leper – Mark 41-42 “Moved with pity, He stretched out His hand, touched Him, and said to him, I will do it.  Be made clean”

The Agony in the Garden – Mark 14

  • Paul expresses strong emotions: Thanksgiving – Philippians 1:8
  • Emotions therefore basically is good

We have a choice

Reaction – Response

4 Elements

  1. Do the right and loving response in every situation
  • Pattern our lives in God’s standard
  • Pray for guidance
  • Our emotions will follow and come into line
  • Begin to thank God and see possible reasons

2.   Aggressive by…authority a son/daughter of God to bring order into our emotional life

  • We do not forget our identity: that we are sons and daughters of God and that we have been redeemed.

3.   Develop a set of strong, committed relationship for personal Christian living

  • Surround yourself with people who will support us

4. Yield more fully to the Holy Spirit and expect Him to transform and our feelings

  • Emotions are gifts from God
  • The closer we are to Christ, the more natural it will be for us to act according to how Jesus would.

FAITH

  • Emotions guided by the Holy Spirit
  • Virtues to handle our emotions:
  • Prudence – help us express our emotions in the right way at right time.
  • Justice – will not take away/diminish (huwag ipahiya and iba sa madami)
  • Fortitude – helps us exercise restraint over our emotions even when it is difficult, especially when they could cause us to hurt others.
  • Temperance – helps us not to act on instinct/impulse and always within the right limits

Emotions – powered by Holy Spirit – moves us to love God and others more

TALK II:  THE CHARACTER OF HUMILITY

  • Allowing God to form our character
  • Willingness to submit to His will
  • To allow His will to take precedence over our own
  • We think we know what’s best for us and we are unwilling to trust God completely
  • Find hard to believe that God actually has beautiful and grand plan for us
  • Afraid how our lives might turn out if we did so

Ways to build our Humility

  • Seek to do God’s will even if that may be the more difficult path/”not according to our plans”
  • Believe that God has plans for us despite our unfaithfulness and sinfulness
  • Trust that God will be with us through whatever difficulties we might encounter when we choose to do His will

Humility – quality by which person considering his own defects, has a lowly opinion of himself and willing to submit to God and others for God sake

  • Philippians 2:1-4 (being humble to others…others first before self)

Elements of Community Life:  Philippians 2:2,4

  • Love
  • Unity
  • Service – do not be boastful, be humble

False Humility

  • Denying the gift and grace given to us by God, for we have all been blessed by God with supernatural graces and natural gifts and talents
  • Share talents/listening/time/budgeting
  • Considering everyone better than ourselves, as though one’s gift from God do not matter at all
  • Having low self-esteem and feeling bad about ourselves
  • Self-pity, just tell the truth without hurting others

False humility may lead to emotional problem such as lack of:

  • Self-respect – degrade self
  • Self-worth
  • Self-confidence

True Humility

Romance 12:13 – “For by the grace given unto me…

  • Acknowledging our own faults and weaknesses as well as the gift of God has given
    • To hold opinion of ourselves based on “sober” judgment
    • To think about ourselves accurately and…
  • Acknowledge that others are also blessed by God with special gifts and talents
  • Considering others as more important than self
  • Entrusting ourselves and our lives completely to God who is greater than we are
  • Putting ourselves in the service of others to glorify God

Truth about us?

  • Neither of the two extremes:
  • Being prideful
  • Self-condemning

God loves and values us

  • Created in God’s own image and likeness
  • Redeemed and made a part of God’s people
  • Each of us has gift and abilities to be used to serve God and brethren

Dependent creatures

  • Reply upon God for everything
  • Only God’s resource of wisdom and power can genuinely change our lives
  • Everything that we have is a gift from God

True Christian Humility

  • True Christian humility ask that we put ourselves in the service of others
  • Charity mission, foundations

Rivalry/selfishness – is a self seeking/selfish ambition.  It is striving for position and power with personal aggrandizement as a primary motive

  • Bringing media once helping others/pasikat

Handling problems..

Desire…

  • Acknowledge the problem
  • Recognize the disorder
  • Admit to ourselves that we need change and that we may need help
  • Ask for forgiveness
  • Accept the truth about ourselves
  • Receive encouragement from brothers and sisters in the Lord
  • Thank you Lord and Praise God
  • Be humble
  • Be patient
  • Pray
  • Lord perfect model of true humility (washing of the feet, dying on the cross)

TALK III:  THE CHARACTER OF COURAGE

External fear – negative encountered from the past (phobia)

Internal fear – something inside us that make us doubt from external fear

  • Affects our relationship with others

What makes us FEARFUL?

  • Past hurts and bad experiences
  • Uncertainty – fear of the unknown, fear of not being in control
  • Feelings of isolation – I am on my own, afraid no one will understand us, fear of losing someone
  • Lack of confidence
  • Sins and feelings of unworthiness
  • Not following God’s will

Results of Internal fear:

  • Avoid new things, thus we fails to experience growth
  • Insecure
  • Anxious and worried
  • Paralyzed – makes us coward to face all fears

COURAGE – LOVE

  • No fear in LOVE…
  • Go to the father first
  • Bow when we submit to the Lord
  • Trust Him

TALK IV:  RIGHTEOUS AND UNRIGHTEOUS ANGER

Anger?

Spiritual teachings regarding anger

John 2:13-15 ; Galatians 1:6; Ephisians 4:26; Proverbs 16:32

James 1:19 Listening and Doing

Anger can lead to hatred, violence and malice

When is anger righteous?

  • When directed against wrongdoing and when it is expressed under control (under God’s control)
  • It is righteous when its object is unrighteousness/injustice/sin
    • Anger is most often a selfish response
    • Aimed anger at the sinful situation, action/behaviour

Wrong ways to deal with anger

  • We can be mad at the sin without being mad at the sinner
  • We must not repress our angry feelings

HOT Anger – nagmumura, sumusugod

vs

COLD Anger – nanlalamig, tahimik nasa loob ang kulo

  • Many times, expressing anger openly leads to grave emotional and spiritual problems

Examples: rage, resentment, hostility, broken relationships, and domination by evil spirits

Right ways to Deal with Anger

  • If it is the long response to a situation
  • Check with God if your anger is righteous or not

Express anger in a way that will not take anything away from the person’s dignity and worth

Meanness and sarcasm – wrong ways to express anger

Patience, endurance and steadfastness, aggressiveness/determined to work…- right ways

“PRAY”

“Be angry but do not sin, do not let the sun set on your anger…

Do not depress anger (be angry)

Express it righteously (do not sin)

Settle things quickly (not let the sun go down on your anger)

Don’t let the devil in (not leave room for the devil)

Repair broken relationships by correction, forgiveness and forbearance

Actively guard our thoughts from whatever is evil/from dwelling too long on our hurts

Ask help from Godly people to assist you in overcoming your condition

  1. Anger is a common emotion among all people, including Christians. It is actually a God – given emotion.  It can be righteous.  It can lead to Christian growth.

TALK V:  THE CHARACTER OF SURRENDER

  • Act of worship
  • Sign of humility
  • Life-changing and freeing
  • Involves mind and body
  • Requires grace (let God and let go…)
  • Surrendering the past
    • Give the Lord our hurts
    • Move forward – move on, let go
    • Unforgiveness forsake us from peace
    • Influence of what we are today

How to let go of the past?

  • Need to know what and specify from what hurt, from what cause it/who that person…

Mother Theresa: “Darkness is the mysterious things what we have from Christ…

  • Perfect love cast away negative emotions
  • Seek God’s love
  • Repent – foundation of healing
  • In all things we should put love
  • Part of humility and love
  • Forgive – not only others but ourselves
  • Priest are ordained and…

…not only in the eyes of God but also in the eyes of men

  • Don’t rely on our power
  • Forgive unconditionally…Forgive! Forget! Let go!
  • Not feeling itself but a decision
  • Counselling –

Feel in new memories – bring out the best in you

  • Healing process – patient, continue to persevere in prayers; working progress

What to do in present and future? Surrender…inspired by the Holy Spirit

  • Always trust His plans for us.

FUTURE – forgiveness in our lives

  • Wants order, prepared life of fullness provide what we need
  • SURRENDER everything to Him from hurts and loneliness

TALK VI:  THE HEART ATTUNED WITH CHRIST

  • Familiarize the character of Jesus Christ
    • Follow Jesus examples because Jesus wants us to be Himself

Example: why we join CFC-SFC? (wants to be close/familiar to God more)

  • To seek God’s kingdom first

John 14:6

  • Ask to be what Jesus was – gentle, humble, forgiving
  • We are God’s chosen ones – God’s beloved
  • He who called us equipped us to be like Him – encourage to change the ways who we are before (we are not aware that we change…)

Sacrament of Baptism

Sacrament of Confirmation – allow Holy Spirit to consume us to follow His living

Sacrament of Holy Eucharist – received Jesus body and blood

Attuning in His Love

  • Living in His Love – abide with commandments
  • Loving God and loving others
  • If we love God we will not be materialistic
  • Guarding our Hearts
  • White lies – justifying our wrongdoings
  • Admit our wrongdoings, accept/ be humble
  • Aware that He is living around us, in us, through others
  • Focusing our mind to Him, His plans for us in our daily lives

Examples:  at work, there is misunderstanding it is how we react – understand and let him talk (don’t let your anger win)

Concrete ways to be attuned

  • Spend time in Jesus with prayer – converse with Him

Example:  courting – to be familiar with the character

  • Talk to the Lord, be open
  • Spend quality time with a person
  • It is during prayer time Jesus is within us

New Testament – fulfill all, how Jesus behave, act and love

  • We become familiar with Jesus by reading the scriptures and thru sacraments

Eucharist –

Confession – healing and experience both in intimate way…

Words of liturgy and present of ministers – to give us unique experience every time we attend

Attending mass and going to confession – we discover/familiar Jesus more

Therefore, Jesus our model, true guide and in His character that makes us truly Christians.

  • The way we our living our life radiates to others and we are unaware that we are acting the way Jesus acts/character
    • Very sensitive from wrong and right doings
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